Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

[Kristatos]

So they didn't actually go with the "we have all the time in the world" line from the script? Thank heavens for small mercies, I suppose.

[Veronica]

That line about a bag making Craig look his best in years is brilliant!

[dirtybenny]

Special Feature Rant: The Spectre Introspection: part 15: “Epilogue”


I know what you’re thinking, after 14 chapters over several months what more do you have to say about this film? Well plenty, some random thoughts, and some things that I couldn’t really include earlier because it would have upset the flow of the narrative.

At times, as I was writing I felt a little guilty, I mean was I being too hard on this film? After all I could just as easily dissect any of the 20 classic films in the same way. However no sooner would I feel that way, when another catastrophic example of poor film making would occur, poor dialogue, poor direction, poor production, it would slap me in the face and literally dare me to keep going. Take the DB10 as one example of many, that cheap gauge cluster that looked as if an 8 year old knocked it together in his grandfather’s shed out of old spares he found in a drawer. Made worse when you think back to 1964 when prop masters were able to create gadgets that appear as if they belonged there. Also remember the DB10 was a bespoke model made specifically for the film by Aston Martin and were not destined for the sales lot as the DB5s were, that’s right Aston wanted the GF cars back to put up for sale, not as Bond collectibles but as standard road cars! Those gadgets and controls had to be completely removed when EON was done, whereas the DB10s if they were not destroyed, were to be museum pieces or collector items, where the cache of gadgets would only add to the vehicles. Consider as well the budgets of the films; even adjusting for inflation GF was made at a mere fraction of SP. And think about the cute labeling of the switches “Air”, “Atmosphere”, “Exhaust”, and “Backfire” why would you do that with switches that are just tacked on to the dashboard? They’re obviously not stock, so they are not surreptitious in nature. If you’re going with the cute labeling, the prop department could have just relabeled the standard climate controls which would have been a much more professional route to take.

Now, I must offer my apologies to John Logan; I cursed him when I first read the Brofled angle of the story in the Sony leak. I laid all the blame at his feet as he was the first author. When I first read the leaked script I believed the line it was an early draft that had since been rewrote, because of that ridiculous story line, add to that a leaked shooting synopsis that stated Blofeld was simply impersonating Franz Oberhauser in order to “Get in to Bond’s head” I felt it was dumb, but an improvement over absolute idiocy. Then of course I saw the film and confirmed the unthinkable, again I cursed Logan. Then I read an article in which Babzy unabashedly brags that she runs EON as an iron fisted dictator, then it all made sense! An idea that stupid could not possibly survive 4 writers a director and an unofficial preview in the form of the Sony leaks, unless the producer is pushing it through with colossal force. No wonder Logan remarked how he wanted to concentrate on television, which seems like a step back, but I doubt you have to deal with producers who micromanage at the mind numbing extent that Babz does!

As I said before the only sin greater than making Blofeld in to Brofeld was that it was all for naught! There was no drama behind it, the story line just fizzled and fell flat. Brofeld was so non-essential to the plot the character could have been made strictly Oberhauser or Blofeld at any time of the production right down to the editing! A snip of dialogue here, a scene trim there and Bro is separated from feld. Brother Oberhauser could have been the head of Quantum working for Blofeld who, considering the voyeuristic theme of the film, could have been watching the proceedings via video camera and seen only over the shoulder as in the old days. Or drop the brother aspect altogether as it’s excessive, unnecessary and ridiculous.

But Brofled had to happen, why? Let’s have a little fun and play forensic psychologist. As I alluded to in my earlier rant the storyline of this film feels like the transcripts of Barbara Broccoli’s psychoanalytical sessions. It’s not a stretch of the imagination to assume Babzy as she calls herself was a “daddy’s girl”, getting whatever she wanted and thus becoming a spoiled brat who runs her business as a tyrant. Now imagine that spoiled little girl watching as daddy spends all his time at the office, remember Cubby cranked out Bond films every other year on average, which would take up much of his time. As daddy does so, she sees her older half-brother who is brought in to the fold after Saltzman’s departure, spend all this time with daddy who is not related to him, as you’ll recall Cubby married MGW’s mother after he was grown. So a jealousy begins to grow. Fast forward a few years and an adult Babzy is brought on to the set in an obligatory role where she starts off as a production assistant performing menial tasks, while big half bro gets a much more hands on approach to production including the ability to write many of the films, so now a resentment begins to foster. When Cubby passes he leaves the company to both of them, making it safe to assume an even larger rift between them formed as they fought over what direction to take the series. So Blofeld had to be Bond’s evil older “brother” in a big F. YOU to MGW. But wait Benny you say, she’s the one with the resentment issues how is this an indictment on MGW? It’s what’s referred to as “projection” which is when someone “projects” their feelings on to another. Think of a philandering husband who believes their faithful spouse is cheating because he is projecting his adulterous acts on her. Of course this is all a fun little exercise, I have no inside information and make no offer of fact in these statements.

Now let us look at the character of Madeline Swann who makes a convincing cut out for Babz. She’s supposed to be “smart”, “clever”, “tough” and “capable” all labels I’m sure Babzy would self-apply. My point here though is the relationship with her father. Swann loves her father who treated her like a princess but was immersed in his “work”. They have a falling out over his “sick life” causing her to run off. I may be grasping at straws here but I see a parallel with the Broccolis. Babzy is treated as a princess but is marginalized as she grows older. She becomes a militant feminist which doesn’t take a stretch of the imagination to believe she sees her father, who made famous one of the most chauvinistic characters in modern history as leading a “sick life”. After his passing she comes to terms with their differences like Swann then continues his legacy but on her terms. Again as above just an academic exercise.

Finally, MGW’s son has said in interviews concerning the next film that when writing, “EON always looks at what the world is frightened of now”. So according to this film, the world is afraid of security cameras first and terrorism as an afterthought? Look I get it, the revelations of how the NSA here in the states collect information is a bit unsettling, but the possibility that the government knows how many times a day I ask my wife what we’re having for dinner is waaaaaaay down the list from random explosions and shootings conducted by men who hate the fact the western world exists on a literally biblical level. And let’s be real EON never made their films based on fear, quite the opposite in fact. Sure EON rode the wave of pop culture and current events, (Space race, etc.) but never played on fear, for example they made SPECTRE the villain in the early films rather than the USSR, going so far as to delete the soviets entirely from some of Fleming’s work, and started teaming up with them in the later films.

[Blowfeld]

I wonder about Barbara. I'm convinced coming into her inheritance late in life after her mother passes she was determined to change Bond. She was embarrassed by Bond (her fathers legacy)because in certain circles 007 cinema was anathema She couldn't hide from it after all she was has a vegetable for a last name synonymous with 007 movies. Michael I felt accepted the good and the bad of the series, in a way like Cubby he understood who he made the films for. When he talked about what made Bond work in the 80s& 90s, in a way he did have a feel for it. I have no idea what new drugs they put him on resulting in the drivel out of his mouth last few years defining Bond as an anti-hero and such.

As I see it the problem with Barbara is she wanted to be take seriously by a click of people who never will. Her privileged history alone prevents this, then is compounded by her inheriting her position. Which does not fly in an industry where female directors and executives work their asses off to find success. A spoiled princess who stumbles in producing one half arsed film after another every 3 years is not going to be revered by those who actually work for their success. Sure she can pay to get her face on the cover of a magazine as a feminist pioneer truth is she not a leading female figure those starting out in the business look up to.
She could change her image by actually producing other movies that explore the psycho drama pabulum she forced onto Bond. Earning her stripes the hard way, she had 20 years to bother try and she didn't. Instead she uses Bond as her guinea pig because ultimately she is lazy as she is greedy.

I recently read a review of the Matt Smith era of Doctor Who, while he was not one of my favourite incarnations parts of his performance grew on me (he was brilliant in the Doctor's Wife). The reviewer was a Matt fan however was very fair over all the last line of their review was along the lines of the failings of the shows are not held hostage by the performances of the actors or writers it was the producers who were at fault. This really caused me think about 007 series, while Daniel is utterly wrong for the role and apparently on a ego trip since since Casino Royale was heralded, he was not the main problem. While his ego trip has damaged Bond, it's Barbara who allowed or insisted on injecting elements which did not belong in Bond. Writers can have bad ideas, to have them so consistently with different writers and directors speaks of another cause.
When I read the script for SPECTRE is was so atrocious it ruined any chance I had to try to lampoon it. The script was so conceited it dipped into the realm of the ridiculous, the fact that smug, pretentious script was approved showed neglect on the part of the producers. However it was probably tailored to stroke the egos of those in charge and the star.

[bjmdds]

Broccoli HATES the traditional Bond cinematic character her father created. She wants him demeaned and shown to be a loser. She has succeeded.

[FormerBondFan]

Broccoli HATES the traditional Bond cinematic character her father created. She wants him demeaned and shown to be a loser. She has succeeded.

It's a waste hoping for the traditional Bond actor to return. Root for Kingsman instead.

[Napoleon Solo]

Here's something from 2012. In an interview, BB said, "“Fortunately, the days of Bond girls standing around with a clipboard are over."

But who did she mean? Holly Goodhead literally was holding a clipboard but was also a trained astronaut and CIA agent.

https://hmssweblog.wordpress.com/2012/0 ... clipboard/

[Veronica]

I agree with pretty much everything Blowfeld said.
I already said even though I dislike Craig for various reasons I blame the producers(namely Barbara) for the most part. Who actually gave part to Craig? Whoever thought of this atrocious brother thing the producers are the ones that allowed that. I also wanna know what the heck happened to Wilson.
For example in 1995 he stated that an actor who plays Bond has to draw audience through his own personality rather than supressing it. By the time they casted Craig he obviously forgot everything about that.

[Veronica]

Here's something from 2012. In an interview, BB said, "“Fortunately, the days of Bond girls standing around with a clipboard are over."

But who did she mean? Holly Goodhead literally was holding a clipboard but was also a trained astronaut and CIA agent.

https://hmssweblog.wordpress.com/2012/0 ... clipboard/

Yeah, we should all be thankful for her meaningful Bond girls like Solange,Fields or Severine. Those women were so meaningful to these plots it's amazing. she's pathetic.
She's trashing her father's legacy even though that legacy is her golden goose. She needs a good wake up call. Pathetic spoiled untalented brat.

[dirtybenny]

Here's something from 2012. In an interview, BB said, "“Fortunately, the days of Bond girls standing around with a clipboard are over."

But who did she mean? Holly Goodhead literally was holding a clipboard but was also a trained astronaut and CIA agent.

https://hmssweblog.wordpress.com/2012/0 ... clipboard/

Mystery solved!



Take a look at what's resting in her lap!

[The Saint 007]

Well done on your critique of Spectre, Benny.

When visiting other Bond forums, I'm noticing more people criticizing Barbara for some of the poor decisions being made, and the creative fatigue of the Bond films recently. People are slowly starting to wake up, but sadly, it still isn't enough for any significant changes to occur.

I've tried to keep optimistic about the future of the Bond series, but lately I'm starting to have my doubts. As much as we complain about Barbara, god knows who will replace her and what they will do. All these crazy ideas about a black, gay, or female Bond may very well happen in the future depending on who takes over.

[Veronica]

The question is IF someone will replace Barbara. Why would she ever step down really? The only reason why her head was above the water that long is because it's her family franchise which became iconic long before she took over. She doesn't have any real talent besides pushing the right buttons so critics applaud these films.
The reason why this reboot came to be in the first place is because she didn't know what to do next at some point.

Ok,so DAD wasn't really the greatest movie. So what?
If the invisible car is the problem then just don't put it in the next movie. The leading lady is a clunky character with terrible lines? Then just try to make a better character out the main lady next time. It wouldn't really be that hard to make a better Bond movie than DAD. But don't ignore everything about the Bond franchise and then 10 years later still talk about invisible car.

[dirtybenny]

Well done on your critique of Spectre, Benny.

Thanks Saint you're too kind!

To the point being made, as we all know Babz isn't going anywhere. She's only in her 50's so we can expect at least a good 20-30 more years of her at the reins. When she does finally move on, EON will be handed to the next generation of Broccolis, and we shouldn't expect any better from them. Consider that Babz still has some sentimentality for the franchise having grown up under her father's shadow, (Not that it's done much good at this point) the next generation will not be under any such constraint and bring a whole host of "new" and "refreshing" ideas to the table, including but not limited to full on remakes of previous classics. (Babzy has already started down that road with SP, but EON gen 3 will take it to a new low)

[Veronica]

I still have hope,however small that someone else will come who would have the talent and will to make proper Bond movies. I know it's not very likely at this point but as a Bond fan I can not lose hope.

[dirtybenny]

I know V, I'm right there with you, every time a new film comes out I hope against hope that this time they'll get it right, and each time I'm sorely disappointed. They say the definition of insanity is to continue doing the same thing the same way and expect different results, perhaps one day Babz will get tired of airing her family laundry on celluloid, hire a team that gives a crap and give us a proper Bond film, but until that day I guess I'll just continue to be criminally insane!

[Veronica]

I think in order to get back to the pre-reboot era Barbara and her current company,pretentious Mendes,ill-suited Craig as well as current writers need to go.
Mendes is already out,luckily and maybe Craig too although he may come back for the money as he himself said. Although I think it's more logical that the studio already showed him where the exit is when they told him to "shut up".
It is simply put in a nicer way it really means it got ugly behind the closed door.But then again nothing is for sure.Barbara thinks Craig is the key of this financial success,bigger than the character himself. Who knows what she is ready to do in order to make him stay.

[dirtybenny]

Special Feature Rant: The Spectre Introspection: Coda: “Dirty Benny’s Quantum of Vindication”

You must be screaming “Benny, more introspection?! This has almost gone on as long as the film itself!” True, however I was working on this rant before I started the “Introspection” and was meant to be the next one, when I had the idea to dissect Spectre, but upon re-reading it I felt tacking it on to this larger project was a good fit.

So the premise here is to look back at my previous rants and comparing to see how they came true through Spectre.


First, in Doubling Down, I said EON’s production style was to take a topic and “double down” on it until the wheels fell off. In Brosnan’s era it was the Bond “formula”, adding more and more “Bond” until it collapses under its own weight (this ties in with the cheeseburger rant in that a burger with every topping is an inedible mess) Once DAD showed EON the folly of their ways they wiped the slate clean and latched on to “origin stories” as the topic du jour. First CR, but that wasn’t enough, so double with QOS, then quadruple with SF (now M, and MP have origins) and finally sexdecuple(?) with SP giving Blofeld (ugh) his “origin”. The thing is EON in SP is doubling down their doubling down, they pump up the self-references to 11 and mash that with soul crushing introspection. It’s as if Werner Herzog crafted DAD!

Next, the afore mentioned Cheeseburger Rant, which simply states Bond is like a finely crafted gourmet Cheeseburger and the formula are the toppings. All that is great about Bond are represented by mustard, ketchup, and relish. However starting in 2006 EON replaced our burger with a dry lobster tail by giving us pretentious rubbish, but still referred to it as a burger. Many clamored to it as they were conned in to thinking lobster tail was classy and Avant-garde, but with each successive movie EON started adding burger toppings to their tail. In their attempt to satisfy both classic and new fans, they created a truly disgusting dish and it shows with the critic’s reactions! The critics went in expecting their pretentious B.S. and got GASP what they referred to as Rodger Mooresq antics! Speaking of critics…

Finally we have “Bond Fans” critics included. The forums are awash with all manner of “fans” who are defending this rubbish, such as the: “Rose Colored Glasses Fan” these folks will gobble up anything Bond, anything related to Bond is the “Best Eva” they love it all regardless. These folks discarded their critical thinking caps long ago and like slack jawed brain dead zombies devour whatever tripe EON slaps down before them no matter how rubbish, and if you’re willing to accept Blofeld as Bond’s foster brother, then you’re part of the problem!

They also go hand in glove with the “Sloths” which you recall harken back to the biblical definition of sloth in which “evil exists when good men do nothing.” These are the forum moderators who shut out all contrary discussion in order to keep their “in” with EON, after all someone has to find out what brand of jock strap Craig wore in Mexico!

Examples of both can be found HERE.

Read those comments and remember most if not all those people posted without having seen the film yet, or even reading the Sony leaks! They had no clue as to what this film was about, yet it was “Bestest Bond EVAAAAA!” and we, the horrid DCINBers were decried the “Losers”. Hey at least I try to know a little about something before I post about it, let alone declare it “Best Ever!” If you feel like feeding your dark side, click around the different topics on that site, especially those related to SP, and watch them feed on each other like the rats in Silva’s corny analogy from SF. Apparently there is a difference between "Pre-Spectre" and "Post Spectre" Bond and these folks have divided themselves in to two camps along those lines!

On to the critics who fall neatly in to the “Johnny Come Lately” category, those who didn’t like Bond until the “Bond” had gone. They panned the Spectre true, but many did for all the wrong reasons. I saw too many reviews that poo-pooed the “fun vibe” being given off by this most current outing. Not that it fell flat, (Which it most definitely did) but that it was attempted at all! If SP is “too fun” for you, you need to give up on life, though I’d say you already have! They lamented how the currency of seriousness that had been hard won in CR was squandered before their very eyes! I’m sorry but Bond has never been about being “serious”, don’t get me wrong it shouldn’t be a farce ether. This is the thinking man’s action series, not as I describe Michael Bay films, which is a barrage of bright lights and loud noises that bombard the audience for 90 minutes, but neither should it be brooding and morose like a Jack Kerouac novel.


What do you think, are there any more topics to come prophetically true?

[Veronica]

The fact that critics complained more about "going back to the Moore style" than the disastrous Brofeld thing is mind boggling.
Even if they did try to bring back that jovial spirit Craig simply isn't up to the task,lacking wit,style and charisma to pull it off.
Besides,the humorous,witty style Moore is famous for is least of franchise's problems at this point. It never was a problem anyway but any problem that ever was is simply beaten by dismal "twist" in SP.

[Omega]

I thought true "fans" who said cr was the best adaptation of a Fleming book, and we have to take them seriously because they read one book, I though those guys would at least be offended with Brofeld. They didn't say a d**n word, if they were the purists they'd claimed to be in 2006 spectre should of been shot down by those fans.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[commander0077again]

I Startpaged "James Bond gets his head drilled" and found discussions on that infamous scene. Some actually consider it serious filmmaking..."Well, one can suppose he could have survived" sort of thing. As usual, being late to the party, must agree with Blowfeld above on the Babz. Unfortunately, sometimes the heir has not met the challenges of life. (Unlike Warren Buffet, who made his kids work; or the great founding chemist Robert Boyle ... his father was the richest man in England, but he was raised in modest surroundings. One can't blame her for accepting the Bond mantle, unfortunately with her limited outlook she views Bond as an embarrassment, instead of the great property that it is. Similar to Ian Fleming's wife Ann, who was embarrassed by Bond with her snobbish friends, which no doubt Fleming had a bit of revenge with OHMSS pot shots at the 'hairy heel of Achilles' (snobbery). And even similar to Stan Lee's take that he didn't consider the Marvel universe he helped shaped to be seriously considered for its own sake. However, as I believe he now sees, he should be justifiably proud of being part of what has become a benchmark in action films. And as we can see in the Captain America films, at the least, we have a blend of the spectacular with a grounding in the 'real' character of Steve Rogers, who was a hero in his heart long before he became Captain America. Thankfully, we don't have a Cap who is brooding, surly, but has a sense of fun, too. (Just noted the Spy Command's post on this, referred elsewhere here in DCNB today).