Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Kristatos » Mon Dec 30, 2019 10:29 pm

dirtybenny wrote:Here's the latest rant and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!! :NewYears:

http://danielcraigisnotbond.com/index/b ... dits-gone/
I've been saying this for a while, both here and elsewhere. But whenever I say outside this forum that EON's PR clock stopped around 1981, some fanboi will always pop up to tell me that getting any information from them is a privilege, not a right, and that I should be grateful that EON deign to tell me anything at all about their upcoming movie.

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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby dirtybenny » Wed Jan 01, 2020 12:28 am

Indeed Kris, these cultists kneel at the alter of EON ether out of brain dead devotion to their idol god or because they don't want to get cut off from the stream of product placement information which keeps their collection of undies stocked up. On the other hand EON wearing their wardrobe made up exclusively of "emperor's new clothes" are blind as to how new media works. A magazine article in the premiere men's mags of the day was the bee's knees in Cubby's day, not so much now.

Speaking of EON's lack luster promotion, I went to the cinema yesterday and finally saw a trailer for The Rhythm Section (looks like Bourne 3 meets Salt, so not too good) at any rate, I had forgotten all about this film and I had just looked it up a week or two ago for a rant! If I recall, the thing's coming out net month and if I, a man who's keeping an eye on the film forgot about it, it doesn't bode well for EON.
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Omega » Wed Jan 01, 2020 5:43 am

See! What can anybody add to that rant? It’s dead on.
And what kris said about eon being frozen in 1982, I think that right on. It was thin in brosnans last Craig’s first few where they pretend to find concept art work or something left in a bathroom stall near by a place eon is filming the latest bond adventure and the tabloid entertainment rag does the right thing by returning them as a reward eon gives them special behind the scenes access for a special edition publication all about the new bond movie.

During cubby’s heyday this was genius marketing. Today’s it as hokey as a music variety show.

I don’t know why they got rid of cubby’s bond formula when it works and lent itself to reinvention with the times. But kept the 1950s madmen pr strategy.





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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby dirtybenny » Wed Jan 01, 2020 8:31 pm

Omega wrote:See! What can anybody add to that rant? It’s dead on.


Thank you Big O, that's high praise!

Omega wrote:During cubby’s heyday this was genius marketing. Today’s it as hokey as a music variety show.

I don’t know why they got rid of cubby’s bond formula when it works and lent itself to reinvention with the times. But kept the 1950s madmen pr strategy.


It's as if they threw the baby out and kept the bathwater. Get rid of the fun adventurous story telling but keep the stodgy print based media stunts!

EON presents the the new Sonny and Cher program renamed the Danny and Babz Hour!
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby The Saint 007 » Wed Jan 01, 2020 10:29 pm

I haven't posted here in a while because I'm just so tired of all that has been going on with the Bond series lately, that I can't be bothered to complain about it much anymore. I have, however, been keeping up with reading your rants, Benny. Your arguments are so spot on that it would be difficult to comment on all of them. But the one in particular that I agreed with most is how some hardcore Bond fans are suddenly freaking out over a woman getting the 007 number, but were totally silent when it came to all the other ridiculous creative decisions made for Craig's previous Bond films.

With an aging Craig as Bond along with talk of how Malik’s villain will be creating an origin story for Dr.No, it somehow reminded me of a video from JonTron called Dr Ho: Licence To Practice. I'll note that the Bond related parts are only in the beginning and near the end of the video, but it's still worth to watch it all as it's pretty funny.



Keep up the insightful and entertaining rants, Benny!
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby dirtybenny » Wed Jan 01, 2020 11:50 pm

Saint old boy! I've been thinking of you, hoping nothing nefarious had happened, I'm glad to see you're doing well!

I know how you feel about the monotony of the poor news streaming from the set of the film series, tell you the truth if it weren't for the fact I write these rambling articles I'd probably do the same, but please don't stay a stranger. Yes those so called defenders of the Bond faith are quite ridiculous and it will be interesting to see how their tunes change once the film comes out and rumors are confirmed or discounted.

It's funny you bring up the Dr. No theory as that will be one of my next rants!

Thanks for sharing the video and thank you very much the the kind words!
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby dirtybenny » Wed Jan 08, 2020 5:59 am

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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Kristatos » Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:56 am

dirtybenny wrote:First rant of the year!

http://danielcraigisnotbond.com/index/b ... ans-dr-no/
Well done on dismantling the Dr No "evidence". There was actually more of it than I knew about, though quantity does not equal quality.

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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby bjmdds » Wed Jan 08, 2020 11:20 pm

Dr. No will be the character. It's not rocket science. Just think like a wealthy idiot, who inherited her daddy's franchise, and is out to emasculate it as well as destroy it, with reconceived character retro-plots, before some conglomerate puts her out of her misery and buys it from her. Our Man Saint, being AWOL 18 months is UNACCEPTABLE behavior, so we suggest you return more often as we all rejoice at the end of the Cr-egg era together over the next 3 months :!: :clap: Even FBF might stop by with good news :!:
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Omega » Thu Jan 09, 2020 12:52 am

I can believe they’ll do dr no just because they have no new ideas honestly they only had to make a handful of films not based on a bond book


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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Kristatos » Thu Jan 09, 2020 7:01 am

Omega wrote:I can believe they’ll do dr no just because they have no new ideas honestly they only had to make a handful of films not based on a bond book


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Like Benny, I am reluctant to say that it definitely won't be Dr No. But the case for the theory so far consists of reading way too much into trivial details. It's "Paul is dead" all over again.

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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Omega » Thu Jan 09, 2020 11:20 am

Kristatos wrote:
Omega wrote:I can believe they’ll do dr no just because they have no new ideas honestly they only had to make a handful of films not based on a bond book


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Like Benny, I am reluctant to say that it definitely won't be Dr No. But the case for the theory so far consists of reading way too much into trivial details. It's "Paul is dead" all over again.

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honestly I agree, but we’ve been disappointed so many times by how lazy eon is, driven by how snobbish and vain Craig is.

Maybe this is a point nobody has made yet, Sean Connery’s bond especially was not a snob, modeled after the working man turned fighting man. The quotes talked about in the latest rant are a perfect example of how Fleming had his bond talk and how much of a average British fighting man bond was. Sure bond had refinement too taught at his school and from society but the thing about bond from the book and early movies is he was not extraordinary because he was bond, what he did and how he reacted was part of who the British people were at the time. Also Chivalrous to women for most part which babs has twisted around to be something different

Craig’s bond is a child of pop culture and is special because he is bond even though he did nothing on his own to earn it. Craig’s attitude about filming is snobbish because he wants to only hang around other Oscar winning actors (craig is a legend in his own mind) and have the top critically acclaimed singers and writers and directors collaborate with him. It is about who is who in Craig’s book.




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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby The Saint 007 » Thu Jan 09, 2020 12:32 pm

Good arguments of how this Dr.No theory is ridiculous, Benny. At this point, however, it wouldn't be surprising if the filmmakers went ahead with this anyway. It seems that they look at the crazy ideas from some of the forum dwelling Craig fanatics for their creative decisions.
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby dirtybenny » Thu Jan 09, 2020 3:19 pm

Yes gentlemen, as I said in my rant and as Kris reiterated, I would not be at all surprised if in actuality Malek does end up playing Dr. No. In fact I'll come right out at this point and say it is more likely than not that he is, since it's been built up so much. However I don't believe it based on the far flung arguments made by not only the two brainiacs I mention in my rant but dozens of others who are making the same cockamamie arguments in the media and on you tube. I'd almost go so far to say these dolts are EON plants trying to give the idea a soft reveal like the Lynch as 007 stories, but unlike the 007 reveal these are too subtle.

I base my belief on EON's inability of late to come up with creative new story lines and characters, instead they lazily rely on nostalgia and memories of earlier far superior films. EON's current modus operandi is to spend the time during production giving interviews to antiquated print magazines slagging off the character and the established series at large, "Oh gadgets, macabre villains and plots of world domination aren't they all quaint, we're beyond that now." "Oh look, here's the Aston DB5 kitted out with all manner of cutting edge 1960's technology!" "Oh and hey look, Blofeld and Dr. No are back, I bet they're up to no good, look out world!"
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Kristatos » Thu Jan 09, 2020 3:26 pm

I know what you're saying, Benny, but with the exception of bringing back Blofeld (which was more of an FU to Kevin McClory than anything else), and perhaps the Moneypenny reveal, their approach has been more in the form of callbacks to earlier, better Bond films. Based on previous Craig movies, I think it's more likely that they will do stuff like have Safin quote lines that were originally said by Dr No, or wear an outfit that sorta kinda looks like his, than actually be him.

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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby dirtybenny » Thu Jan 09, 2020 3:55 pm

That thought had occurred to me Kris while writing my rant and may very well be the case, in fact I got that notion from the video I linked in the rant. I think it was one of the points that guy was trying to make, unfortunately it was so convoluted it was hard to tell. If that is the case then Malek is not in fact playing Dr. No, but rather simply spouting verbal homages, much like Agent Fields wasn't Jill Masterson but rather a cheap parody.

Ether way I doesn't really matter as it's just cheap nostalgia writing used as a short cut rather than putting any real thought or effort into the process.
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Kristatos » Thu Jan 09, 2020 3:59 pm

dirtybenny wrote:That thought had occurred to me Kris while writing my rant and may very well be the case, in fact I got that notion from the video I linked in the rant. I think it was one of the points that guy was trying to make, unfortunately it was so convoluted it was hard to tell. If that is the case then Malek is not in fact playing Dr. No, but rather simply spouting verbal homages, much like Agent Fields wasn't Jill Masterson but rather a cheap parody.

Ether way I doesn't really matter as it's just cheap nostalgia writing used as a short cut rather than putting any real thought or effort into the process.
It's the same problem I had with JJ Abrams' Star Wars movies, and Star Trek: Into Darkness. They just copy a bit of Wrath of Khan or Empire Strikes Back and rely on the warm, fuzzy glow of nostalgia.

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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby dirtybenny » Thu Jan 09, 2020 4:09 pm

Kristatos wrote:
dirtybenny wrote:That thought had occurred to me Kris while writing my rant and may very well be the case, in fact I got that notion from the video I linked in the rant. I think it was one of the points that guy was trying to make, unfortunately it was so convoluted it was hard to tell. If that is the case then Malek is not in fact playing Dr. No, but rather simply spouting verbal homages, much like Agent Fields wasn't Jill Masterson but rather a cheap parody.

Ether way I doesn't really matter as it's just cheap nostalgia writing used as a short cut rather than putting any real thought or effort into the process.
It's the same problem I had with JJ Abrams' Star Wars movies, and Star Trek: Into Darkness. They just copy a bit of Wrath of Khan or Empire Strikes Back and rely on the warm, fuzzy glow of nostalgia.

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Precisely Kris, pretty much EON's M.O. since Die Another Day.
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Veronica » Fri Jan 10, 2020 1:10 pm

Honestly, the line that set me off was "Time isn't kind to men who play God.", which Craig oh-so-seriously utters in the trailer.
If it does turn out to be true it's nothing we haven't seen before and honestly after BROfeld nothing can shock me anymore.
It still would be better if it doesn't though since recreating two iconic villains in a row screams "We have no ideas anymore."
Might as well tattoo it on their foreheads.
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Re: Dirty Benny's Weekly Rant

Postby Omega » Fri Jan 10, 2020 2:43 pm

Well that quote going to become “ time isn’t kind to men who play bond” after the first blogger get a chance to post


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