Discussion SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

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Discussion SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Kristatos » Sun Dec 07, 2014 7:54 pm

Meh, I'd just written a third chapter, somehow failing to spot that one had already been written. Seems a shame to waste it, so here it is, but for the purposes of this collaborative effort, Cap's chapter three should be considered the "official" one: (I've edited this post to put my text in spoiler tags, so that it doesn't disrupt the narrative flow of this thread once more chapters are added).

CHAPTER THREE: VIOLENCE IN THE LIBRARY

The assailant's name was Dave Henchman. He was a low-level operative in an as-yet unidentified organisation, by which I mean SPECTRE, obviously. Bournd had been sent to track him down to Tangier and terminate him with extreme prejudice. "Extreme prejudice?", Bond had asked M. "Maybe you should send 005 for that - I hear he's a member of UKIP".

This pun so annoyed M that he started to yell "Adava Kadav...' before stopping himself and remembering that he had got his franchises mixed up.

Upon further enquiry from Bournd about his mission objectives, M had clammed up, muttering something about how they had thought that it would make a good pre-credits sequence. And so, here he was in a library in Tangier, being charged the huge, bald-headed man who Bournd guessed was probably a former wrestler of some sort. He did a nifty sidestep and Henchman slammed into Mr White, sending them both crashing into a rack of bookshelves, which collapsed on top of them.

"Well, they just had a whole load of books fall on top of them" smirked Bournd, before realising that he really wasn't very good at these sorts of quips. "Oh bollocks", he snorted. "Cut to main title".
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SPECTRE Novelization Discussion Thread

Postby dirtybenny » Wed Dec 17, 2014 5:28 pm

Hi All, I thought it might be a good idea to have a separate thread in which we can discuss the Unofficial Novelization and share ideas without interrupting the flow of the story as well as post "lost chapters", works that may have been too late to post in the novel but don't want to waste.
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Re: SPECTRE Novelization Discussion Thread

Postby Kristatos » Wed Dec 17, 2014 5:38 pm

I was thinking the same thing. It occurs to me that the last time, with the Skyfall novelisation, the fact that it was the product of diverse hands, each with their own vision, hurt it a little. But this time round, it simply reflects the source material. It doesn't have to make sense, because the film probably won't.
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Re: SPECTRE Novelization Discussion Thread

Postby dirtybenny » Wed Dec 17, 2014 10:13 pm

Kristatos wrote: It doesn't have to make sense, because the film probably won't.


You can definitely say that again Kris, it won't!

You're absolutely right in that it will be easier this time around (although I missed out on the last one, I see what you mean having read through it.) considering we have the entire plot line laid out for us.
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Re: SPECTRE Novelization Discussion Thread

Postby dirtybenny » Fri Dec 19, 2014 5:42 am

Here's a couple extra title verses.

Spectre, Spectre, we’re cutting a big check there,
Our money would be better spent if we just gave to the poor
Spectre, $300 million not a penny more.

Spectre, Spectre, we just don’t give a fleck there,
You’ll be asleep before the second lion’s roar
Spectre, you’ll snore!

Spectre, Spectre, a pain in the neck there,
Political Correctness has cut to the core
Spectre, my jaws on the floor!

Spectre, Spectre, you’ll wish a bird your eyes will peck there,
The script should be trashed right after its tore,
Spectre, your nerves will be sore.
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Re: SPECTRE Novelization Discussion Thread

Postby Kristatos » Fri Dec 19, 2014 7:57 am

I moved my "lost" chapter from the novelisation thread into this one, and it now appears at the top of the thread. I'll have a go later on at organising the plot details we know into chapters. This way, people can plan out in advance who is going to tackle what chapter, to prevent this sort of thing happening again.
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Re: SPECTRE Novelization Discussion Thread

Postby Kristatos » Fri Dec 19, 2014 12:09 pm

OK, here is the synopsis from Gawker, divided into chapters and supplemented with material from the leaked notes (in red). Any additional observations are in green. Needless to say, if you want to avoid spoilers, look away now.

Chapters 1-12: Bond, having destroyed part of Mexico City on a rogue operation,

Chapter 13: and facing forced retirement as MI-6 merges with its sister agency MI-5, (M meets Bond in a cemetery to tell him this)

Chapter 14: escapes across Europe on a mission posthumously assigned to him by his late boss, M (played by Judi Dench).

Chapter 15: He seduces the wife (Monica Bellucci) of a man he assassinated (who he meets at a dance class), and, using information from her, attends a meeting of a sinister group of masked terrorists led by a man who knows Bond from his past. (Mickey Mouse line presumably goes here. Blofeld's cat seems to make an appearance somewhere in this chapter).

Chapter 16: Meanwhile, Bond's current boss, M (Ralph Fiennes), battles his likely successor and the head of MI-5, C (Andrew Scott), over the future of an intelligence sharing program called Nine Eyes (at the bidding of a mysterious "voice on the phone". This parallels the bad guys coming together as SPECTRE, a point that should be laboriously hammered home at every opportunity).

Chapter 17: Bond witnesses the death of Mr. White, a villain from Casino Royale, (who lectures Bond "for the third time in an hour" about how he's going to die a lonely death) and finds White's daughter Madeiline Swann (Lea Seydoux) in Austria.

Chapter 18: The pair head to Morocco, get drunk, screw, have stilted conversations, take a train to the desert,

Chapter 19: and kill a henchman named Mr. Hinx (Dave Bautista).

Chapter 20: Bond meets the villain, a mysterious man named Heinrich Stockmann, who also uses the alias Franz Oberhauser, played by Christoph Waltz.

Chapter 21: In an irritating expository monologue, Stockmann confesses over dinner that he is Bond's older foster-brother and also the head of a terrorist organization named Spectre.

Chapter 22: Bond is tortured;

Chapter 23: and then for unclear reasons manages to bluff Stockmann into rushing back to London, where it has become clear that C has been working for Stockmann the entire time.

Chapter 24: Bond, accompanied by Q, who was in the next cell the whole time, follows Stockmann to London, where he kills him.

It becomes harder to match up the notes to the plot synopsis the further in we get. I assume Tanner's betrayal is revealed towards the end. Now, does anyone have any chapters they particularly want to write?
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Re: Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Kristatos » Fri Dec 19, 2014 8:53 pm

Actually, re-reading the synopsis, it occurs to me that the events of chapter 13 should really have occurred in my last chapter, but unfortunately, I had only really skimmed the synopsis and notes when I wrote it. Do people think it should be fixed with another chapter, or should I go back and rewrite chapter 11? I could probably do it without affecting chapter 12.
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby dirtybenny » Sun Dec 21, 2014 7:23 pm

Kristatos wrote:Actually, re-reading the synopsis, it occurs to me that the events of chapter 13 should really have occurred in my last chapter, but unfortunately, I had only really skimmed the synopsis and notes when I wrote it. Do people think it should be fixed with another chapter, or should I go back and rewrite chapter 11? I could probably do it without affecting chapter 12.



Personally I have no objection either way, Quite frankly I think we're putting way more thought in to this than EON is putting in to their script, but I'll defer to your good judgment Kris.
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Dr. No » Thu Dec 25, 2014 5:00 pm

:lol: I don't know if they still do them but there used to be fan made Bond movies, low budget, cheesy but fun. There is enough here for a fan film to be made before the real movie!
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Kristatos » Fri Dec 26, 2014 6:35 am

From the looks of the latest information, it appears that the scene in the graveyard comes later, and that all I really need to do is replace the Minister of Defence with C. Here is the original version of chapter 11, preserved for posterity:

CHAPTER 11: WHAT SONY MAY SOON BE FILING

Bond stood in M's wood-paneled office. With him were M, Q and the Minister of Defence, Sir Jewemy Upperclass-Twytte. Without further ado, M began the introductions. "Sir Jewemy, this is Commander Bond, one of our best field agents on the rare occasions that he actually works for us. And I think we both know our quartermaster, Captain Ronald Obvious. Now, 007, I'll get straight to the point. You remember that hard drive we had you chasing during the last kerfuffle, and then sort of forgot about? Well, apparently, it contained the script of this movie. We're worried that those bas***ds at DCINB will get hold of it and use it to create some sort of parody novelisation thingy. We'd like you to retrieve it for us."

"And on the way, we expect you to get a life", chimed in Q. "Because that's the theme of this movie, getting a life. You see that lifeless stuffed animal over there", he added, pointing to a stuffed bear in the corner. "That's you, that is".

"Yes, thank you, Captain Obvious" snapped M. "Now, if we're all...."

He was interrupted by a knock on the door. It was Bill Tanner with some teas and coffees. "Ah, Sir Jewemy" beamed M. "Allow me to introduce my trusty chief of staff, Bill Tanner. I don't think there's another fellow in the service as trustworthy as him. Trusty trusty trust".

Tanner blushed and set the drinks down on the table. "Why thank you sir. Now, have we finished with the foreshadowing? I have work to do".

"Yes, yes, of course. Run along". M dismissed him with a wave of his hand. "You too, 007".

As Bond left the office, he pulled the note from M's predecessor out of his pocket and looked at it once again.
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Kristatos » Mon Dec 29, 2014 7:28 am

I've shuffled the order of scenes a bit. In the shooting outline, Moneypenny turns up at Bond's flat, hands him the DVD of Dame Judi and a box of artifacts from Skyfall, then we have the Q scene, then another scene of Bond in his flat studying the artifacts. But we've already had the note from Dead M, so I thought I'd skip straight to the Q scene and the next scene could be Moneypenny turning up with just the artifacts. Hope that's OK.
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Daltonite Toothpaste » Mon Dec 29, 2014 9:40 am

Another rogue operation? These days, Bond spends more time going rogue, than any actuall spying.
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Kristatos » Mon Dec 29, 2014 12:13 pm

Daltonite Toothpaste wrote:Another rogue operation? These days, Bond spends more time going rogue, than any actuall spying.

I think I made an allusion to that in one of my chapters.
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Daltonite Toothpaste » Mon Dec 29, 2014 9:14 pm

Don't forget, M MUST follow Bond around on his mission. For no reason other than to give the M actor more screen time.
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Re: Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Kristatos » Tue Dec 30, 2014 7:25 pm

I made Blofeld as close to Dr Evil as possible, as I know how sensitive EON are about the comparison. I wondered whether it would be funnier to actually call him Dr Evil rather than Blofeld, or would that be overdoing it? What do people think?
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Blowfeld » Tue Dec 30, 2014 10:11 pm

Most of this I had written previously as part of another story. No clue where to place it so I'm dumping it here.

Humbly submitted; my attempt to lampoon Daniel's hectic work scheduled. _.//

Prelude to a thriller

‘So, 007, lots to be done. Are you ready to get back to work?’

‘With pleasure, M, with pleasure.’

The dignified man behind the desk wearing a dark Savile Row (tm) suit sporting a matching sling cradling his left arm sat down unceremoniously, using his good arm he opened the top secret drawer secreted in his desk carefully shifting through the contents trying to find the Strangway file.

‘Err. Sir?’

M halted his search looking up at the dower 007.

‘Is there a problem 007?’

‘Well sir. Seeing as I was reinstated with all back salary and benefits restored. I’d very much like to take all of my accrued leave now.’

“What?” The question popped loudly inside M’s balding head.

‘Sorry 007, I don’t believe I find your attempts at humour as amusing as you do.’

‘Oh no sir. There is nothing funny about unused leave.’

M studied 007’s constipated face searching in vain for any sign of humour. “d**n it!” he thought this daft ape is serious.

‘Correct me if I’m wrong.’ M spoke calm and rationally. ‘I seem to recall you telling everyone you were ready to get back to work?’

‘Indeed sir. With pleasure.’

‘Then what is all this rubbish about taking a vacation?’

‘It’s not rubbish sir, it is my right as an employee of Her Majesties’ Secret Service.’

‘How the hell is it you have any leave left? Didn’t you fake your own death to hang out in a seedy bar that only served Heineken. Having sex with wanton abandon with whatever low hanging bar fruit you could find!?'

‘They’re called “Skanks” sir. Slightly below low hanging fruit, a tad above forced sex worker.’ Bond paused before continuing. ‘Just barely.’

‘You abandoned your post to go on tour of Europe’s low rent brothels, yet you expect me to approve this?’ M’s voice managed to conceal his growing contempt.
‘No. Not if I have anything to say about it. Consider your request denied.’

007 showed no emotion only looking at M with his dull lifeless eyes. M had expected some sort of reaction.

Thinking the matter closed M continued.

‘Now that matter is out of the way I have a case that should be just your speed.’

007’s dull eyes blinked.

‘Oh. Sorry sir. It rather isn’t up to you.’

‘What!?’ this time the words escaped M’s mouth.

A blinking yellow light on M’s caught his attention. Mashing the button down he spoke harshly.
'What?'

In the back of his mind M cursed himself for using such a low rent word so quickly in succession. His mind couldn’t grasp how that damned Bond managed to drag him, a well-educated, cultured man, down to his (Bond’s) level.

Moneypenny’s husky yet feminine voice spilled like honey over the speaker.

‘Sorry to interrupt. It is an urgent call.’

‘Take a bloody message! I’m in meeting!’ M’s voice rattled the room.

‘Sir. It’s about Bond.’ Moneypenny whispered.

‘Bond? What about him?’

‘I wouldn’t know sir. However it’s Human Resources, they would like to speak with you about him.’

‘Do they? I’ll take the call. Maybe they can clear this mess up.’

‘Very well sir. Line one.’

M turned his glare on Bond.
‘Don’t happen to know anything about this do you?’

Bond's hollow voice responded he did.

‘Yes sir. I had a call in this morning to them.’

M sneered as he pick up the phone punching line one with a vengeance.

‘We will bloody see about this!’ he snapped at Bond.

‘M here’ he spoke into the phone regaining much of his lost composure.

‘Ah, HR, how are you. Good. Good. What brings you to call me? 007? Yes. Yes. I am aware of that. Well, no I was not informed of this. Not at all. I don’t see how that is applicable.’

He swivelled the chair away from Bond until the back of the chair presented itself.

‘He bloody faked his death.’ M’s voice hissed quietly ‘He is damned lucky not to be facing charges. Well, no, he is not facing charges. But.. Yes. I reinstated him.. No. That never came up. Well then I will just fire him.. What do you mean I can’t!’

In stunned disbelief Gareth Mallory swivelled back around to face Bond once more. He had just learned a disturbing piece of information, in fact it was what ultimately caused his predecessor (Olivia Mansfield) to go stark raving mad. As his mind raced absorbing the new facts he felt he now knew why the previous M had Bond shot off a moving train in a country with no workers rights.

The fact that shook the new M so profoundly was as a government employee Bond simply could not be fired.

M continues his conversation as he looks upon Bond in utter disbelief.

‘So tell me how much leave as he accrued?’

A pregnant pause fills the room.

‘thirty-six months!!!’ M’s bellow was heard through the sound proof door.

The matter was settled, so Bond gave M a nod indicating his respect, then walked out the room in his short mincing strides without a another word.
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Blowfeld » Tue Dec 30, 2014 10:16 pm

Should this thread be renamed to planning, staging area?
At first I had a sinking feeling I posted to the main story.
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Re: SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Kristatos » Wed Dec 31, 2014 9:17 am

I don't see a "rename thread" option in my moderator tools. It may be something that only Goldeneye can do.
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Re: Discussion SPECTRE: The Unofficial Novelisation

Postby Goldeneye » Wed Dec 31, 2014 3:48 pm

I believe either of you have the permission set to change the name. Edit the subject of the first post of a thread to change the topic name.
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